Respect.

Mere food, clothing and shelter ain't sufficient to live off till you die. Life involves Respect. Respect for self & from others. It quite amusing about the baits which are thrown to pull respect out of people. Respect, these days is obtained, but not acquired.

What is that which demands respect in an individual? Education? Not the degrees that occupy space on your visiting card, but the one which manifests the inner wisdom to differentiate between good and bad. Nobility? Generosity? No. Its the education you buy buy with your money. Dowry that comes seeing your pay slips & permanent residence status. The car your drive, the place you dine at, the clothes you wear & the foul mouth you use to display autocracy.

I don't deserve to stay here. Blood people eavesdrop; blame money. I thought I have been faring well. from a totally fucked up ground to something which made some sense. It ain't enough. More riches needed if more respect needed.

I tried talking to my boss @ work asking him what fulfills him. I thought he is the right person to question about money because he earned it. He smiled & smile was his answer.

May be yeah, trying to possess everything makes me appealing. Pursuit starts. Change dominates. Ideals are being pushed off the cliff. New mask acquired. New outlook ahead. Yeah, more riches promised.



Money sucks!

Those walls and Their Destruction

As everybody has set out on their own boats heading to different destinations, its high time I call this a transition phase. Pen isn't moving further but with the unbearable load on mind, I have to ooze this out to feel better.

They say old school friends bring back flakes of the old you before you get lost in memoirs. With more & more new ones adding to the list, I am not sure whether they can be called Friends. Its all part of business transactions. Money is involved in everything. This compels me to look up to that corner of the room only to revisit the good old times.

Things were way too different very recently; in fact, fantastic till the new decade commenced. everything gradually got fucked up or must I say I fucked everything up? Lessons were learnt at the cost of people, virtues and good things. Fake people crept in & flew out, leaving me much wiser & cautious inside. A couple of life changers happened for which I am gratified to destiny, hadn't they happened, I wouldn't be sitting here to jot this piece down.

Construction demands patience, perseverance and a lot of determination. The will power to stay convicted & to let go of anything which may be even priceless in order to attain something is essential. On the other hand Destruction is very much a one-step thing. The irrational craving to fuck everything up is so highly dangerous and addictive. It can just ruin everything in seconds. This is where the will for personal success plays a vital role.

Many a time did that craving invite me warmly but I preferred to stay out there in cold, trying to make everything help to the shore. This piece certainly appears vague for people but things are making total sense to me.


People slip away, but even time does. Clinging to the walls of past doesn't intrigue me any more. Trying to build new ones surely does! 

Contemplation and its counterpart

What is that which keeps people apart? What probes to dream about doppelgänger and befriend imaginary friends? Tyler Durden, according to me, is only a doppelgänger. Seldom do they come into sunlight & face the reality. Confrontation scares their asses off, so much as they tend to live the dark side.

There is, my friend, a lot of difference between solitude and loneliness. The latter one is highly dangerous and rib tearing in virtue.

A circumscribed feeling that invades a person in absence of somebody would make days tougher, indeed the nights, the toughest. There's always this somebody in front of whom you tend to pour out & if luck favours, its well and good if that somebody is a great listener.

There's a lot humans have to toil for & accordingly a lot of turmoil is promised in the process. When you walk back home, all drooped down, clinging on to the gate, ready to hit the sack; then those soothing words from somebody can actually lighten up your mood, elevate your spirits & make you call it a fair day.

Its pretty wonderful how there's a paradigm progress in human wish list's horizon. It keeps extending into unknown distance; indefinitely.

These human relations are the ones that warn you, keep you grounded, make you feel like a star whilst your feet are still on the ground. Pretty necessary, aren't they?

That some one to share the happenings, to seek opinions from, to arrive at decisions with, to implement them & to sigh along with; at dusk.

As the dusk breaks, clouds of darkness scamper & mosquitoes hover above you & you decide its time to leave, you need a helping hand to get yourself on to your feet to keep walking into the woods; only to disappear forever.



Silence and trampled sand stay behind there as reminiscences of the spent time. Skies smile welcoming a brand new guest!

Life: Cricket alike.

Now that somebody's flying down in few days (or months) & something really big is due to happen in much lesser time, fingers are crossed.

I am just trying to make it a habit to write daily. Remembering a friendly challenge that happened between my and my friend on one of those week days' mid day drinking episodes at club 8, I put down my 4th consecutive cricket book. Two more ordered & are probably on their to press my calling bell in another 2 days.

There's something remarkable about people. They way they were, the way they transform, & the way they become who they are. This metamorphosis happens in a great stadium called Life where all the acquaintances of a person will be seated to watch the action in live. That's so much Cricket alike. Its so collectively endearing & individually discrete at the same time.

In the meanwhile, there is art to entertain spectators during recesses amidst performances. The art is something that makes the whole play tolerable for people who cannot stand the pandemonium involved in live action in the stadium.

The performances happen continuously, merely the performers change. Game's always played; with periodic (sometimes not) change in teams, individuals.

Art plays a cheer girl; that person becomes the batsman & situations constitute the fielding side. Each one bowling at one time (in cricket its one bowler at a time, but its not the case with life even. Life can be ruthless at times, you see). Its all in the hands of the batsman to make the spectators clap or curse. But something's so certain. He lets the spectators have a wholesome entertainment all through the while he's out there in the middle (all his life) before he departs (to his death bed).

Life's so much like Cricket. And yeah, its a batsman's game unfortunately! 

Sizing Up

The film is finally out. I am glad it is. Could finish something which had been in the pipeline for a really long time. Now that the film's over & people are back with their own affairs, the quest to do something again began.

As a matter of time, I was trying to figure out how things changed. They did. Very drastically. From being a jobless soul to somebody who has a week planned waiting ahead. From a dreamy, careless person to somebody who think twice before saying something & thinks 10 times before actually doing something. From an easily irritated guy to a patient person. From a guy who had parents totally dubious about their son's career to the one whose parents aren't shy to disclose their son's identity among their peers. Dramatic changes, aren't they?

All can be owed to sizing up the situations and reacting accordingly. Heard furious jokes bombed on me, suspicious friendships & ruffled relationships.

Where does this all take me to? Probably to a shore of being an informed person with tonnes of solitude, silence and faint smiles around my neck? May be.

I hardly have any peers now. Hardly. There were times when she complained about me not devoting sufficient time for her & her companionship and my friends were all blame for that. Now she's the one who asks me to make new friendships & cherish the old ones. This too changed, didn't it?

I hardly get angry now. Probably silence taught me this. Confronting something dreadful with the corners of lips almost touching my ears has become a usual thing.

To the memory of good old times & hope for better coming times, this piece stands as a silent witness ending with a strong full stop.