Art, it is.

ఆమనోస్తే కొమ్మలన్ని కోయిలమ్మలు కదా!
ఆమె నీకై సాగివస్తే ప్రేమ రుతువే సదా!
దేవుడైన రాముడైనది ప్రేమ కోసం కదా!
ప్రతి జీవితం ఓ వెలుగు నీడలా బొమ్మలాటే కదా!


I bow down, Veturi. That one stroke of your pen has been successful in elevating my mood & saved me from the momentary melancholy. I haven't felt this low in the recent times & this is the song I usually searched for, on my playlist, till a couple of years ago. I haven't heard this song in ages. I acted pretentiously matured & thought I might have outgrown this feeling that listening to some old song which I used to listen when I was extremely depressed would not do any good now. But that old man who left this world and created an irreplacable void in the Telugu lyric industry, proved me wrong totally. He was a magician, I must admit. I know I am too mortal to announce something about this super mortal persona but now I really feel like.

May be that's the sheer brilliance an artist would usually deliver; that leaves the normal humans' jaws dropped and heart beat skipped. The second line from the above telugu verses he penned reinvented the trust I have got in Love. May be that's what makes a life worth living for a mere mortal like me. Wait endlessly for some art to be delivered & get lost in its's beauty, brilliance and charm once it is out.

I'd be sinned if I don't acknowledge the life poured into this song by Shankar Mahadevan & K.M. Radhakrishnan. That combination & coming together to create some magnanimous art which will go ahead to become immortal in the hearts of ardent followers. Artists coming from diversified backgrounds & with more diversity in their art, sitting in a room and creating art is something hair raising.

It could be anything, literally anything. One of the foremost reaons for which I earnestly respect art & astists as well is 'Creating something out of nothing'. You look at a plain chart, you look at it again after a couple of hours, brushes deliver strokes, colours sprinkled, a brain works and there you are, Witnessing something genuinely creative and authentically unique. The fact that the one you are witnessing is the only piece in the world makes your blood go cold. Classic.

I remember a status update on facebook from one of my friends which almost goes this way : 'Art does not stop wars nor it feeds people; but for that it doesn't have to. Art makes life bearable & worth living'.

So true.

The makeover

I always had this feeling that an afternoon nap makes the rest of the day very gloomy & the feeling proved out to be right today again. Growing oblivious conveniently to the circumstance prevailing at my place, I lazily insert my feet into my slippers & drag myself to the Moonstar. I buy myself a couple of sticks & make myself comfortable at one of the tables.

Crushing the first cigarette to death, I lose myself to thoughts, staring blankly at the railing that separates the cafe from a forbidden parking lot. This feeling of inertia grows within. Certain questions arise. Why am I a changed person? This feeling is pretty strange and amusing. uring teengae hangover, I was so talkative, enthusiastic & more importantly, very extensively open and receptive. I always welcomed discussions, made vows to abandon few things and so on. That was indeed fun. As mentioned in my previous post, that 'resigning' into myself wasn't there earlier. I sometimes tend to label that as 'laziness' but on a broader platform, both are two distinct terms. With lot of difference.

That is right what Sirish said. Growing up is so much of pain. I'd like to make a little improvisation to that statement. I'd rather say 'Being a grown up involves so much of pain'. Okay, seems like I am deviating. Back in to the ring. I hear a bang behind me, I hardly care to turn back & see what has happened. No, that ain't laziness. The retrospection that goes on in the mean time between the time when the noise was heard & the moment when I'd possibly turn & look back. As again aforementioned in my earlier post, its predictability. Trying to figure out what could have happened. While going through the entire paragraph, the one common underlying point that could be noticed is 'talking to myself'. The thought process that sees light emerges out of talking to myself. This is where I've been struggling to arrive at, from the past 50 or so lines.

This is evolution or development or growing up; whatever. Reduce talking much outside & gradually (proportionately) developing the habit of talking to self. Being proactive replced being reactive. Sitting in a corner, preferring solitude, hanging head down & going through things. I did not yet arrive at the point where I could be able to differentiate or rather judge whether being that way does any good or not but presently, I am liking it.

The need to react vocally has been reduced. It hasn't been decreased. It has been reduced. One should acknowledge the human effort here. A cluster of bars fall across the vocal cords when I am expected to reciprocate & instead a smile would appear on my lips, silently requesting the other person to accept that smile as my response. That'd be extremely safe, diplomatic & hassle-free.

Feels good to document the littlest details of my life after quite a long time.


God bless.

Tomorrow is brighter : An unfulfilling prophecy.

There was a time when I used to be stubbornly optimistic & used to wait for the good times endlessly. I argued untiringly over this wearing a tag name called 'hope'. Slowly, I began to lose that. The conclusion that it isn't going to be any different from this has started to become clear. As fancied many a times on screen, the very thought of something miraclous waiting across the lane for us makes it so exciting but at the end of the day, it is 'unrest' with all we'd be left with. So the bottomline should be this way 'Tomorrow ain't going to be any different. Now take it.' The significant virtue this mankind has developed over ages is Predictability. This is it. If I am fortunate enough, i'd get into some job with some steady pay in the near future; with 5 days of work and 2 days off from it; hopefully get married to the woman I love & lead life. It's always good to read about something far from conventionality but it doesn't really work well in my life (afraid of generalising which could possibly hurt few people).

That's a quick piece of writing after a while. That is for now.



See you again.